Axiom Funk "Funkcronomicon"

 (Universal, 1995) I must have listened to this in 1995, Pedro Bell was really proud of the cover art and I had the CD, butdamnedif I remember it well. I recently picked up the vinyl that came out a couple years ago, and I can't believe I let this gather dust. While ostensibly this is a Bill Laswell record it is actually the best Funkadelic record of the 90s, featuring P-Funk OGs George Clinton, Bootsy, Gary  "Mudbone" Cooper, Michael "Clip" Payne, Gary Shider, Eddie Hazel, Bernie Worrell, Maceo, plus folks of equal funk footing (Sly and Robbie, Sly Stone, Herbie Hancock, Bobby Byrd, and even a Last Poet and dude with a bucket on his head! But assembling all-stars is one thing, more importantly, this album is a super successful, loving embrace of the earliest Funkadelic albums with some actual covers and returns to P-Funk themes of yore, creating a deep, loving declaration of loyalty to to The Funk. There is some stuff that has the kind of atmosphere you'd associate with Laswell (especially a trancelike Hendrix cover by Bootsy) but most of this is just outright soaking in cosmic slop. But what  I came for was the gatefold art and GODDAMN! Pedro was not yet having too much trouble with his sight in '95, but he still was rarely as focussed and powerful as he is here, and the assistants he sometimes used rarely were as true to his style and vision as Seitu is here.The amazing package includes a funked up booty art cover, plus a comic where Laswell gets destroyed by a soul-sucking green titty demon, plus some panels memorializing Hazel, goofing on "Newt Gangrene," and getting spook nasty, plus liner notes! This is amazing to listen to and better to look at. Pedro Bell forever!

Blowfly, Live at the Red Line Tap, September 20, 2014

 

Guest Review by Steve "Pudgy"DeRose (Note: This is a "lost" review from 2014 that we are publishing for the first time. Blowfly passed away is 2016. Steve's Twitter account, however, survives, if you can handle soccer fanaticism and Japanese panty pictures)

There may have only been fifty-five patrons in attendance, but I'm sure they had a rollickin' good time at Blowfly's first performance in Chicago since September 2012. Had Blowfly changed that much since being profiled in Roctober #30 [2002]? Maybe, maybe not?

What was definitely changed was the venue for the concert; which also had the Untold Dirty, and Baby Brotha on the bill. It was the Red Line Tap [formally Roy's] at 7006 N. Glenwood on Chicago's far north side. the Red Line Tap is associated with the Heartland Cafe around its corner. Previously a show like this might have wound up at the Empty Bottle, or the Double Door.

The crux of Blowfly's act is that he's going to sing all the dirty and nasty lyrics to tunes you assign to other musical acts. Bawdy lyrics go back at least a millennium, so this can't be considered new. The comparison to make is with "Weird Al" Yankovic. "Weird Al"'s novelties are strictly "PG." Blowfly's versions are rated 'X'" (although I have never encountered a movie rated "X" for language - "rated 'R'" probably wouldn't sell as many tickets).

Blowfly begins the show wearing a hockey mask. The mask only lasts the first three songs or so. I did not recognize a lot of the songs he was parodying (and he didn't do "I Want To Be Fellated", which is what I was hoping to hear), so they must have been relatively recent. His backing band is a three-piece; the standard guitar, bass, and drums. He involves the audience in most of the numbers, going as far as bringing a female up to the stand to specifically impart the message he is intoning. Heh heh heh heh.

The most entertaining part of the concert was when he told the story about being on Dick Clark's American Bandstand when early rapper Kurtis Blow was also booked. This leads, as you may anticipate, into an extended rap playing on Kurtis' last naem. it was hilarious.

He also does at least one straight song associated with Clarence Reid (from the 1970s).

His set began 40 minutes late, but the opening acts were equally at fault. The show is just about 60 minute. 'Curfew' at the Red Line is 1:00am. Singing ended at 12:50am, and the next thirty minutes or so were taken up by commiserating with patrons, selling merchandise, and posing for photographs.

I have a Twitter account (@pudgem29) which delves into topics some people can't handle. But @officialBlowfly is one of two high-profile accounts who actually follow we (@BeauDure, a soccer writer, is the other). For that he certainly deserves something. He got as Japanese adult video from me. I've heard some scuttlebutt that Blowfly is being exploited and/or manipulated by the other guys in his act. But what ultimately matters is the quality of the performance. This was a solid hour of off-beat entertainment. If you can tolerate "blue" humor (& you should), you ought to buy a ticket to when this tour comes near you. Particularly if the venue being booked is as intimate as the Red Line Tap. Who else does this? Is there anybody new who is attempting an act like this? How much longer can he continue to do it?

Reese's Big Cup with Pretzels, Resses's Mystery Shapes

 

(Hershey's) OK, I got really exciterd about the Big Cup with Pieces, but these two offerings brought me back to earth. The pretzel pieces, and the savory salt flair, are fine, but unlike the the wat the candy excess of the Reese's Pieces makes the jumbo size of the Big Cup feel more substantial,this somehow unembiggened the candy overall. But it's way better than the dumb mystery shapes, which are all vaguely Christmasy, but not really. The chocolaty off-setting  off-kilter shape-like reveals of a blobby snowman or an amorphous stocking look more like poop than sweet delights. And poop in a stocking is worse than coal.

AC/DC "PWR UP"

(Columbia, 2020) They had a Rock Mission, and they accomplished it: this sounds EXACTLY like an AC/DC record! Which you may scoff at, but think about the times the Ramones failed to make a record sound exactly like a Ramones record, which is ostensibly 3% easier. After one member died, one got caught for murder, and one lost his hearing the idea of a mostly intact reunion seemed unlikely, but here it is, as solid and thunderous as ever. PWR UP (not to be confused with the Pwr Bttm, gratefully) does have a weird spoken part that sounds eerily like Gene Simmons on "Domino," but I blame Brian's audiology therapist for that, everything else is just about perfect, and even that is kinda amusing.

White Castle Sloppy Joe Slider/Smoky Joe Slider

 

(White Castle) Any time a White Castle marquee lists something I have not tried before I feel both obligated (they have served me well over the decades) and genuinely excited to try it. Often they are not great - mediocre waffles do not a good bun make, and everything does not work in nibbler form - but every now and again they hit. Now the Sloppy Joe is a weird one to undertake, because I imagine for most of us (Adam Sandler affirms this) our experience with them is from school cafeterias, so any affection has to do with nostalgia for mediocrity. And as far as that goes, the basic SJS delivers the inadequate meat to bun ratio, and the slightly tangy but not actually tasty sauce. However, add a slice of cheese and both of those faults are mitigated to a degree. I believe these sandwiches have been offered before, somewhat forgettably if my memory does not serve me, but this year they have added a welcome variation. The Smoky Joe not only pays tribute to the Robins R&B hit (with more gusto than the Broadway jukebox musical of the same name, which did not feature the song in its entirety), but by adding some extra flavor and some cheese and some crunchy onion ring crumbles this now appeals to me as much as it does to Joe. To Joe who, you ask? Joe Mama!

How to with John Wilson

(hbomax.com, 2020) This is the best TV show I've seen in forever. Most of the short series consists of the meticulous lo-fi poetry of documentarian/editor Wilson illustrating his monologues about how to negotiate contemporary life with mundane, hilarious, poignant, disconcerting, joyful, astounding clips of the streets, stores, people, vermin, pets, signs, garbage, commerce, scaffolding, and feces of New York. The City is captured with more wonder and truth than the films of Woody, Marty, or Spike. While affecting a naive outlook he invites outgoing individuals to share seemingly bizarre aspects of their values and belief systems, but not because he is making fun of them or even because they are the world's weirdest people. It is because he gives them an opportunity to keep talking and does not stop listening. When a delightfully demeanored regular dude who is good at cooking, and good at explaining how he is doing it, also happens to open up about his theory of extraterrestrial infiltration, it is not because he is king kook, but because Wilson made him feel comfortable to share ideas that he, and perhaps many people you see all the time, find important. And while this may be the cheapest show on HBO, it is possibly the most masterful. Without spoilers, I have to acknowledge how genuinely brilliant it was for him to ask an intact-foreskin advocate about what recent movies he liked. Who would have known that question would lead to the best 20 seconds of TV this decade? How To Make The Best TV Show? Like this!

Reese's Stuffed with Pieces Big Cup

 

(Hershey's) The reason the King Size Snickers is such a magnificent candy is girth.Or more accurately, presence, as it takes up so much space and represents so much protein that instead of seeming like a snack it seems more like a steak. Long before the Seinfeld gag about eating a Snickers with knife and fork I marveled at the meat-like presence of the mighty King Size Snickers. But it just tastes pretty good. The Reese's Big Cup has the weight of the KSS (symbolically, not sure of the net weight), yet tastes a little better, but without the power/oomph/mouthfeel of the Snickers' intact peanuts. But add Reese's Pieces inside the peanut butter cup's peanut butter and you not only get crunch, but it is a sweet, sinful candy crunch! And the fact that you have candy coated peanut butter densely surrounded by the same peanut butter housed within the candy shell is an enigma inside a riddle. Or a chicken nugget floating in puréed chicken. This is a substantial, excellent confection!

Heroes of Chicago House Coloring Book by Plastic Crimewave (Intro by Pepper Gomez)

 (Wake Up!) Steve Krakow's portraiture has improved over the years, to where he can really capture character and nuance in the eyes and smiles and posture of the under-heralded heroes of Chicago music he honors. Of course, it is hard to capture the energy and joy and seriousness and playfulness of house music in a drawing...but you can provide that when you color them in! The local history of house music, as it played out on the South Side, North Side, and eventually in other cities and countries where obscure Chicago DJs became superstars and Chicago underground heroes went unknown, is complicated and crazy. Suffice to say, some of the selections and omissions here would spark debate, and a few vocal critics would argue that some Villains of Chicago House slipped in. But the best part of a l-o-n-g night of dancing is the ethereal vibe of pure love, so putting aside any politics, this is just a beautiful tribute to Frankie and Ron and Julian and Farley and Marshall and Mr, Fingers and the other architects of Chicago's best export outside of cheese/butter/caramel popcorn mixes. Speaking of mixes, my favorite page, as a CAN-TV cable access veteran, is the inclusion of the always interesting Marcus Mixx (one of the best drawings in the book). 

Chuck Berry "Wild Berrys"

 

(Pickwick, 1974) Yes, this is a Pickwick knockoff of Mercury-era blues songs, but if this had the same cover art and they had titled it "Chuck Amuck" it would be my all time favorite Chuck Berry album.

Zine Explosion 1985-1995 by Burf Quimby

 

(Quimbys) Mr. Quimby has established himself as a towering historical figure in modern zine history, opening the best zine store in the world and more recently bringing zine retail back to New York, so reading this first hand, brisk, excellent summary of the key movers, movements, moments and mishegas in 80s and 90s zine history is a delight. I appreciate that he celebrates some of the transgressive characters and trends that might not be smiled upon as much today without acting like things were unproblematic nor putting down current mores. Along with some of the other mini zines he has been producing of late, I am really impressed with his development as a designer, with a clean simple look that still nods to the xerox era.